Quantasmically Plumpful Ramblings

I am an enigma trapped in a leaky milk carton that's been perpetually thrown at a screen door for nineteen years... yeah, that makes sense...

Disclaimer: I am really sarcastic... or a sociopath. Whatever you choose to believe...

I have considered my spirit animal to be an otter (because I'm playful but aggressive in an innocent way), but other personality traits have led to my characterization as a cat because I perch myself on chairs, stalk objects, am a generally awkward person, and have the ability to claw the shit out of your drapes, figuratively and literally...